Just A Little Bit Stronger

Did you ever felt so hurt that your heart is in pain? I’m pretty numb about everything but for some reason today, talking to various people, I realized that it’s possible with everything that happened. I was asked why I don’t open up and I don’t understand how he can’t see the reason when it was all around us. At the end of all of this, I will be stronger. Just when I thought I was able to start opening up and letting my wall down, someone had to come and make me build my wall up even higher.

I wanted a guy’s point of view of things that were going on so I texted Travis, “I need someone to converse with if possible”. This was at 11:30pm, when he usually studies. Next thing I know he was on Facebook Chat. Then at my door when he realized this was a face-to-face conversation. We talked for a little over 2 hours. Given we talked about random things at times, he was able to give me opinions about the situation and about the people involved. It’s nice to know he’ll kick someone’s ass if I ever ask for it. Brother Bear to the rescue. He has class at 7:30am and he stayed up talking to me. That’s a real friend. And I hope I’ll never lose him.

Woke up late today and I still feel the sting of the pain,
But I brushed my teeth anyway.
I got dressed through the mess and put a smile on my face.
I got a little bit stronger.

Because of all of this, I didn’t want to come home. I didn’t want to deal with anything. But of course, life goes on. And it’s just another thing we have to learn from. No more emo posts for a while after this. I just needed to get it out.

Penn State brought me and a friend even closer than before. While driving her home and talking, she was able to share something that she’s only shared with one other person here at UTSA. That means a lot to me. It made me understand why she is how she is. And for her to trust me with that information … indescribable feeling.

I hope everyone’s having a good week! It’s hump day! We’re halfway there! Smile

2 thoughts on “Just A Little Bit Stronger

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